“Well, conditions are quite harsh here. We’re advising all of our clients to invest all their resources into canned food and shotguns.” This nugget of sage advice comes from the Brain Gremlin – a lab-engineered, speaking, bespectacled member of the slick creature crowd that overruns Manhattan’s ultra-modern Clamp Tower skyscraper in helmer Joe Dante’s madcap sequel Gremlins 2: The New Batch. On the surface, it’s nothing more than an financial suggestion from one monster to another. Yet, curiously, it’s also surprisingly sturdy life guidance. Seriously, listen to my reasoning.
When things go bad, the most counterproductive action you can do is approach matters with excessive gravity. The Brain Gremlin comprehends this. In fact, most of the toothy monsters that inhabit Dante’s unrestrained 1990 movie (arguably his best) possess the same sly, self-aware comic sensibility regarding the blurry line separating everyday life and unadulterated chaos. It’s a single component of Gremlins 2: The New Batch that ensures my return – and the older I get, it’s the message that strikes the deepest chord.
A Youthful Obsession
Naturally, my fondness for this movie didn’t start on such an deeply thoughtful note. Growing up, we were limited to a few battered VHS tapes at home. Included within that collection were Gremlins and its second chapter, the latter housed in a chunky ex-rental box likely purchased from an non-chain rental store and boasting grimacing beasts on its knackered cover. I was immediately enamoured and these films quickly proceeded embedding themselves inside my tiny, impressionable mind. From then on, they became an near-everyday part of my youthful watching schedule.
Dante’s first film usually receives all the plaudits, thanks mostly because of its legacy as a semi-scary seasonal fave – and don’t get me wrong, I’ve watched Gremlins an incalculable number of times. Nevertheless, its follow-up rarely gets the same level of high regard, which feels criminal. As a kid, I’d always seize the chance to watch Gremlins 2. During bright summer vacations, I’d seclude myself indoors and play it. When I obtained my very own TV-VHS combo unit, it remained on repeat in my bedroom. Over time, it became deeply rooted in my psyche. If my parents noticed this obsession, they appeared unbothered.
Deeper Discoveries and Societal Nuggets
As I matured, new insights enriched repeat viewings, heightening the enjoyment of watching diminutive verdant beasts joyously wreck a New York high-rise. I learned the forward-thinking property magnate and Clamp Tower owner, Daniel Clamp (John Glover), was based squarely upon the later-to-be-president Donald Trump, with his red-headed employee Marla (Haviland Morris) referencing his one-time partner Marla Maples. Luckily, Clamp has more heart than his genuine article inspiration.
The “end of civilisation” video Clamp plays during maximum monster mayhem? I discovered it was inspired by a actual “Doomsday” video commissioned by the CNN boss Ted Turner in case the world really ended. I noticed how Dante took extra pains to film varying versions of a self-referential segment where Gremlins hijack the exact movie you are viewing. A version for theaters, another for home video and television, each providing a grinning portion of meta pop-culture magic ahead of its time.
An Enduring Legacy
While it was creature designer Rick Baker’s fantastically vile creatures that drew my gaze as a child, this deeper gold held my interest as an adult. Eventually, I even spoke to Dante about it myself and he had no qualms informing me he made the movie with the specific aim of mocking those who loved its goofy-but-heartfelt predecessor and wanted more. “We were going to make fun of the fact you came to see it,” he happily revealed. This Looney Tunes-esque rebelliousness and resolve to not take his sequel as solemnly as his Warner Bros bosses clearly wanted him to, only deepened my appreciation further.
When I went through a sudden family bereavement recently, I was surprised to find that, during my deepest grief, all I felt compelled to do was sit and watch Gremlins 2: The New Batch. Strange, isn’t it? Possibly not. The nostalgic calm it provided was needed to weaken my mind’s sadness sludge – but the insights it had imparted to me as an adult were similarly beneficial.
Like Gremlins rampaging through a genetics laboratory, there’s certain elements in life you just cannot manage. Dante knows it. The Brain Gremlin knows it too. Sometimes, you have to emulate them: embrace the chaos, invest all your resources into preserved goods and firearms and try not to take things too seriously.
It’s powerful existential guidance from a most improbable origin – and it’s why Gremlins 2: The New Batch will forever remain my go-to cinematic solace.
